I realized that I hadn’t posted anything in over a month. I’m afraid I’m starting to feel like I’m stuck in Groundhog Day and no sign of finding my way out. That’s not really much of a joke, at least not an original one, because I’m certain I’ve made it before.
There have been a few things that’ve changed this last month and a half.
Let’s talk personally because I think this is where I struggled the most. As we all know 2020 payed a huge toll on me. I slipped into a very deep depression. One that I didn’t even realize I was in for several months. All I wanted to do was sleep, I didn’t want to do anything else, had no desire to write, craft, workout, play any of my games. I was always on the edge of tears with nothing bringing me any joy. I woke up sad, I went to bed sad, and the hours in between I wanted to die.
It took several months for me to stop trying to convince myself I wasn’t depressed and actually saw it for what it was. I was depressed and if I didn’t try to make some changes I may never have found my way out of it. I’ve been working really hard to find my way back, find my center again, laugh more and cry less.
The meditating was the start of that, it helped to center me and calm my mind. I started sleeping better at night and was no longer dragging through the day. I have been coming to terms with my loss of Ninja, April 6th was the one year anniversary and it was a hard day. I let myself be in the moment, let myself feel the loss without getting lost in it. I believe if it wasn’t for the meditating, I wouldn’t have been able to do that.
But I want to say this so that it’s understood, everyone experiences depression differently. Just because meditating helped bring me through it, doesn’t mean it is the do all end all of curing depression. It’s important everyone not only figures out what works best for them, but they are able to recognize when they need help and to ask for it. Some may need therapy, some medication, there are many ways for people to help center themselves.
This was how I did it.
The last few weeks I’ve been back to a workout schedule. Very exciting. My knees aren’t as happy with me, but I’m getting my body in motion and that helps with centering my mind as well. I’ve been able to complete a couple of my virtual races which is exciting since they were fairly long distances. I finished my conqueror’s challenge of Cabot Trail, which was 288kms and Lake Erie, which was 388km. Both took me several months to complete.
There were huge gaps in my progress logging, but with the last few weeks I was able to close the gap and get them done.
Now professionally, I had written a few thousand words in the last month. It is both good and bad, good because I have finally reached a place where I wanted to write again. Bad, because I have a lot of words to write to meet any of my goals.
Which brings me to the newest of writing news. When I decided that this year was going to be a gap year I had cancelled all my beta and editing dates. I figured I would just write straight through and worry about everything else closer to the end of the year.
Well, turns out I’m not so good without direction. Not having any deadlines means that I have no accountability. This translates to me never getting anything done. How I do I fix this? Well, I have set up a schedule with set beta and editing dates. I still won’t be publishing until March 2022, but I will be producing so there is no pressure to get the book out on time. Because of my not writing the last four months, I’m not going to say wasting my time, because it wasn’t a waste of time. I was doing a great deal of self-care.
Anywho, because I’m only now getting back into the swing of writing, I am scheduled to write two books to completion and about 90% of a third book. I will also be completing a short story that will be in the same world as the trilogy I’m working on this year. The Young Chronicles will be releasing March, July, and November of 2022. (To get sneak peaks and cover reveals for this trilogy, you will need to sign up to my newsletter.)
So there you have it, exciting I know, a tiny bit of Groundhog Day, but not too bad, right?
Oh, I thought I would mention this little Facebook group I have. I can hear the collective groans now, “not another Facebook group”! Unfortunately for me, it’s the nature of the beast when being a professional writer who wants to connect with her readers.
But I digress; this group Book Parties and Giveaways is geared toward just as it says. When you join the group you will get notifications of upcoming book parties. These parties will have four to five authors talking about their latest work and giving away free stuff! So give it a click, join up and wait for the notifications.
This group will only be active a few weeks before a party and the day of. Then it will go quiet again. Book parties will be three/four times a year. One is coming up July, 2021! So go on and join!
That's it for me!
Stay Safe, Stay Healthy, Love Always, and Follow Your Bliss!
Spent my Valentine’s Day brushing off my photography skills. I am a bit rusty and unfortunately no longer have a decent camera for this type of photo-shoot. It’s been many years since I’ve even touched anything photography-y. (I think that’s a word- ish.) Anywho!
Currently my cover artist is putting together the cover for my urban fantasy “Darkness Looms”. I wasn’t overly happy with the stock art he was using for the image. The idea in my head is quite specific.
He tried several different things and I just wasn’t happy. So I thought, “Why don’t I just take some of my own pictures?” I asked my niece if she would like to be my model for the day and she was all on board.
So I spent my Sunday taking pictures of the different poses with different props. It’s hard to say if my cover guy will be able to use any of them. But fingers crossed!
On the writing front, I have been struggling to get back in the chair. I have gone through some of my notes in my “bible” for The Young Chronicles, but nothing seems to be shaking the motivation tree. But now that it’s mid-February I have to start looking at the cold hard stark reality of where I am.
Where is that? It’s simple, if I don’t start getting my daily words in I will not complete the projected five novels that I planned to write this year. It’s buckle down and knuckle down time. I’m not sure how I am going to do that just yet. I may have to be a brunt force situation, possibly shut off all internet access, have my phone taken away, gaming site passwords changed. Yup, I’m a teenager that doesn’t want to do her homework.
I guess I need to be grounded.
I’ve been slowly getting back to moving about. It’s been slow but I’ve managed to string several days in a row before my body says it needs a break. (I honestly think it just doesn’t want to do the work.)
That brings me to another major goal I have, I would love to do the Camino de Santiago pilgrimage. This is at minimum 100km trek. I can’t do 100meters right now. So I need to start getting my body ready for this. I have a few years; I would like to do it in my 50th year. No I will not tell you my exact age, but let’s just say I’m closer to 50 than I am 40.
I need to knuckle down for this as well, not just so I can live out this bucket list item, but because I need to take my health more seriously or I won’t make it to my 50th.
So on that note... I have a great deal of work to get done so that’s it for today.
If you want a peek at the photo session from today, or get snippets and clips from upcoming work, or even cover reveals sign up for my newsletter!
Follow your bliss!
Stay Save, Stay Healthy, Love Always.
I have a tendency to ramble when talking to friends. I figured why not share my ramblings here with you nice people!